Acts of Kindness: Powerful, Positive and Practical

What happened to kindness?

We rise by lifting others.

Robert Ingersoll

The truth is, kindness has become less important in our lives for several reasons. Technology has a lot to do with how we spend our time. Instead of having meaningful conversations with each other, we are spending time with our faces buried in apps on our phones. We’ve lost the human interaction whereby we talk to each other, listen to the other, and laugh with one another. 

Fear of being attacked for something we say or do has made us lose the ability to be friendly or kind to each other. No one likes the feeling of being vulnerable, and indeed we don’t want someone to take advantage of our goodwill. People believe they are safer if they keep the blinders on and mind their own business.

Our upbringing and manners have changed considerably in as little as thirty years. Our fast-paced life doesn’t allow for a few minutes to notice the neighbor that once mowed his lawn weekly, now only does it on occasion. 

What difference does it make if you are kind to others?

Kind words can be short an easy to speak but their echoes are truly endless.

Mother Theresa

Every action you take affects the life of someone around you. In many cases, the person cannot reciprocate the act of kindness. Hence the term of paying it forward. Putting others ahead of you or their problems ahead of yours allows you to take control. You are humbly taking control of yourself, your thoughts, and your deeds. Showing kindness is the only action you have total control over.

You might be asking yourself, “What can I do?” Keep in mind, no act of kindness is too small. Something as simple as a smile, a nod, or even a passing hello can change the world of someone that just got fired from a job, evicted from housing, or struggling with grief.

If we slow down and pay attention to the people around us, we will see exactly where we are needed. Not everyone has a cell phone, and you may need to call a relative for someone lost or disoriented. Not everyone has a vehicle. Can you offer a ride to somewhere? Sometimes our neighbors go hungry. Can you share a meal?

Being kind, showing kindness is not so much about giving away our identity but enhancing our compassion to help those that are lonely, struggling, or in need. We don’t need rewards because we offered a bag of clothes to a neighbor. We don’t require a payment because we drove a neighbor to a faraway place out of compassion.

Does being kind make you healthy?

Kindness is the language the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

Mark Twain

The health benefits of being kind can have a positive effect. First of all, helping someone out of a bad situation can make you feel good. Acts of kindness can lead to better health and longer life. Studies show that volunteering weekly makes you 10x more likely to experience health benefits. 

Just like being depressed makes a person ill, determined acts of kindness can lift a person out of the pit of despair. Oddly enough, those who are struggling with health issues are the perfect candidates to perform acts of kindness. Interacting with other people will take the focus off themselves while they concentrate on helping the other person. 

How can we be kind? 

The great acts of love are done by those who are habitually performing small acts of kindness.

Victor Hugo

Stop being critical of other people. Instead, work on being compassionate. No one can fully understand where another person is coming from, so we have to stop judging them for what we perceive as inadequacies, failures, or differences. 

Your focus should be on wanting to help that person right where they’re at in life. Give people the benefit of the doubt. When you support the person in need, you are transforming the lives of (at least) two people; yours and theirs. Then there is that possible third person; the one watching your selfless act, which could experience a transformation.

Take, for instance, the viral act of kindness from high school students Kristopher and Antwain, who surprised their bullied classmate Michael with clothes and shoes. In the end, all three students were surprised by the sudden uptick of fame and glory that followed them thanks to social media and Hollywood celebrities. Money, clothes, and a guest appearance on a famous talk show to visit with Will Smith and Ellen Degeneres were rewards for the kids. Their act of kindness also bestowed on their high school campus a pair of shoes for all the students.  

Merriam-Webster defines humanity as compassionate, sympathetic, or generous behavior.  

Why should you be kind?

Every act of kindness grows the spirit and strengthens the soul.

Anonymous

Let’s face it. Your kindness probably won’t be broadcasted for all to see, but fame and attention shouldn’t be the reason you want to be a caring person. Recognize that we are all in this together. It is up to each of us to strengthen our fellow neighbor, student, or peers.

Kindness is a practice that requires a particular focus. A writing journal that focuses on keeping a running list of random acts of kindness will help unleash a better you. This list is not for glorification but instead should be used as a learning tool. It’s a self-discovery that will build your confidence. Looking at a journal that includes your gratitude and unique acts of kindness will intensify and help you to increase or offer more significant acts of kindness. When you write in your journal, don’t forget to be thankful for having the skills, tools, and time to do something for someone else.  It’s easy to forget to give thanks for those things that are immaterial.

Related Article: 5 Reasons to Write Something Today

You can see how you move from holding a door open for passersby to unloading the grocery cart for the elderly parked next to you to mow the lawn for your infirmed neighbor. You can use a journal as a tool to help you process what you have done out of kindness to a more significant act of compassion.  

Did you hear about the Arizona police officer that took a vacation to help a 94-year-old man move to Florida? Sergeant Jeff Turney took time off to help a stranger relocate 2,200 miles away. The older man was determined to pull up stakes and go to a facility in Florida, but the officer felt compassion and took it upon himself to help. Will celebrities reward him? Probably not but he didn’t do it for any reward here on earth.

How to be kind:

• Be polite – Yes, by just being polite, saying “May I?”, “Thank you.”, or “Yes ma’am” and “No sir” are simple and painless ways of showing kindness. Begin by being polite and respectful.
• Make genuine compliments – People are going to know when you’re not sincere, so be careful about throwing compliments around aimlessly. To use accolades sincerely, look the person in the eye and be creative with your praise. Instead of saying, “That shirt looks good on you.” Try saying, “Vibrant colors make your eyes shine.”
• Be friendly – Are you too shy to make friends with the new neighbors or the new kid in school? A simple “hello” with a smile is sometimes all that person needs to feel the kindness.
• Be optimistic – We all have crummy days, and sometimes we are sadder than we care to be kind. But happiness, joy, and gratitude are at the heart of kindness. Focusing on the positive will put your mindset on being helpful, no matter that you had a crummy day.  
• Be a good listener – Avoid distractions. Don’t try to have a come-back ready. It’s okay to acknowledge you don’t have a clue as to how to fix the person’s problems. Sometimes that person needs a little time to vent their fears or frustrations.
• Be available – In today’s fast-paced society, we’ve lost our human connection. Social media has too much importance. People text before talking or let the phone go to voice mail. If you want to be kind, it’s as easy as a handwritten note, a phone call, or a special uninterrupted visit.
• Be compassionate – When we are self-involved in our issues, it’s easy to lose our kindness. We snap at our loved ones, thereby impacting that person with our negativity. Ask yourself, “Is this kind?” If you can’t say yes, then change your attitude.  Kindness towards the other person will relieve you of the issues you face; effectively killing two birds with one stone.

You can learn kindness by following these three suggestions:

Communicate:

Communicate with a smile, a nod, a wave, or a handwritten note. With communication, we become emotionally involved. We can then relate, overcome language barriers, and become more aware of our surroundings. 

Understand: 

Understanding emerges with each relationship built on kind acts. We can make sense of what was unfamiliar or strange. We may even come to understand our self at a deeper level.

Service:

Service becomes meaningful when our heart is in the right place. We alleviate suffering, improve lives, and discover new pleasures. Service to others forces us to move out of the selfish mantra and into a more meaningful and harmonious human path. 

Nurture the act of kindness with simple behaviors. Uplifting somebody else will give you a sense of purpose because you were able to make the other person’s life a little better. Remember that acts of kindness create a positive loop that makes you happier and, believe it or not, kinder. As long as you give kindness with no expectations in return, two lives will be freer, calmer, and fulfilled.

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